dv8_fx
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For all you Kris Kringle Klingons out there 
......... Something I picked up in my net journeys (lost the link but saved the message )......... I may not be around for the season tho I may visit from time to time .......
Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year To You and Yours......
vee
Greetings Everyone!
Lt. Commander KHyRon (Greg Gruschow) created this article back on 12-19-95. I wanted to share this with all Klingons because it adds that "Klingon Style" to the Holiday Season.
This was reprinted because of the good quality and imagination that was created….
Kragtowl, Da'Har Master
(William "BEAR" Reed)
Greetings All,
Well it is that time of year again, when that jolly old Terran will make his yearly appearance. I say Klingons unite! No longer will we of the Empire suffer this Santa Claus to continue his reign of goodwill.
To stop this Claus fellow once and for all, we need to know all about him. This is difficult as he keeps a low profile, however some facts follow that should help in our quest to capture Santa for the Greater Glory of the Klingon Empire.
#1. This man is known by many names. Most common: Santa Claus, Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, Papa Noel, and St. Nick.
#2. While it is well known that Santa Claus bases himself at the North Pole of the planet Terra, nobody to this day has been able to exactly pinpoint his locale. This points to a cloaking technology of immense power. Power we Klingons should control!!
#3. Santa Claus has no fear of being captured, and dresses himself in an outlandish uniform of garish color... practically inviting attack. Why does he have no fear? Answer: the Terrans who worship him routinely dress like him each year, providing thousands of decoys for would-be Santa snatchers. Be warned.
#4. Santa Claus has an intelligence network even more powerful than that of the Obsidian Order or Tal Shiar. It is claimed that he has a list of everyone and KNOWS whether they have been naughty or nice. He keeps constant tabs on Earth children to monitor their sleeping habits as well.
#5. By some means not yet understood by Klingon science, Santa Claus is able to visit each home on Terra and drop off toys to children that have succumbed to his twisted ideals of morality. Logic insists that this cannot be done in a single night, but he somehow manages it year after year, population notwithstanding. This points to a far superior propulsion system than has ever been developed by any space faring race. By disguising this advanced craft as a reindeer powered sled, he proves his reputation for slyness.
#6.Old legends persist of Santa's ability to alter his shape to gain entry to any house. This suggests that Santa Claus is indeed a Founder, shaping the children of Terra for his own diabolical purposes. If this is the case, Santa Claus should be treated as EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.
Santa Claus your, days are numbered! We Klingons are coming for you!!
Lt. Commander KHyRon vestai-HoHwI'yIHmey
(Greg Gruschow)
Commanding I.K.V Rising Phoenix
Northern Quadrant
Dark Moon Fleet
......... Something I picked up in my net journeys (lost the link but saved the message )......... I may not be around for the season tho I may visit from time to time .......Merry Christmas and A Happy New Year To You and Yours......
vee
Greetings Everyone!
Lt. Commander KHyRon (Greg Gruschow) created this article back on 12-19-95. I wanted to share this with all Klingons because it adds that "Klingon Style" to the Holiday Season.
This was reprinted because of the good quality and imagination that was created….
Kragtowl, Da'Har Master
(William "BEAR" Reed)
Greetings All,
Well it is that time of year again, when that jolly old Terran will make his yearly appearance. I say Klingons unite! No longer will we of the Empire suffer this Santa Claus to continue his reign of goodwill.
To stop this Claus fellow once and for all, we need to know all about him. This is difficult as he keeps a low profile, however some facts follow that should help in our quest to capture Santa for the Greater Glory of the Klingon Empire.
#1. This man is known by many names. Most common: Santa Claus, Kris Kringle, Father Christmas, Papa Noel, and St. Nick.
#2. While it is well known that Santa Claus bases himself at the North Pole of the planet Terra, nobody to this day has been able to exactly pinpoint his locale. This points to a cloaking technology of immense power. Power we Klingons should control!!
#3. Santa Claus has no fear of being captured, and dresses himself in an outlandish uniform of garish color... practically inviting attack. Why does he have no fear? Answer: the Terrans who worship him routinely dress like him each year, providing thousands of decoys for would-be Santa snatchers. Be warned.
#4. Santa Claus has an intelligence network even more powerful than that of the Obsidian Order or Tal Shiar. It is claimed that he has a list of everyone and KNOWS whether they have been naughty or nice. He keeps constant tabs on Earth children to monitor their sleeping habits as well.
#5. By some means not yet understood by Klingon science, Santa Claus is able to visit each home on Terra and drop off toys to children that have succumbed to his twisted ideals of morality. Logic insists that this cannot be done in a single night, but he somehow manages it year after year, population notwithstanding. This points to a far superior propulsion system than has ever been developed by any space faring race. By disguising this advanced craft as a reindeer powered sled, he proves his reputation for slyness.
#6.Old legends persist of Santa's ability to alter his shape to gain entry to any house. This suggests that Santa Claus is indeed a Founder, shaping the children of Terra for his own diabolical purposes. If this is the case, Santa Claus should be treated as EXTREMELY DANGEROUS.
Santa Claus your, days are numbered! We Klingons are coming for you!!
Lt. Commander KHyRon vestai-HoHwI'yIHmey
(Greg Gruschow)
Commanding I.K.V Rising Phoenix
Northern Quadrant
Dark Moon Fleet
